What is your favorite savage mom moment?

What is your favorite savage mom moment?

What is your favorite savage mom moment?

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I walk in through the side door, a few minutes before curfew, and to my surprise, Mom is still up. Reading in the living room. I walk in and tell her I’m home, all is well. Mom looks up from her book and has a funny expression on her face.

“How was the film review?”

“Uh, good, we saw some interesting things the other team does. Maybe a couple of things we can exploit. We’ll try some stuff in practice this week.”Mmmhmmm… tell me, do the Roberts brothers, Chase or Tyrone wear body glitter?”

I shook my head, “what?”

She looked at me with her eyebrows raised, and I began to feel rather self-conscious. Then I looked in the mirror and saw that the right side of my face looks like it’s been sprinkled with fairy dust. I’m sparkling.


You see, I told Mom that I was going over to a friend’s with other football buddies to watch game tape. A normal thing to do, sort of. But in reality, my girlfriend’s parents were out for the night and so was her little brother, so I was over there is 16 years old. She wore body glitter to look “cute”.

Totally. Busted.

Mom just said, “to your room, grounded for two weeks, no motorcycle for a month.”Yup, okay, not going to argue. It’s not wise to argue with my mother. Especially when you’re caught dead to rights and have no logical counter-argument. I just got smoked, no two ways about it. So I went and showered up and retired for the evening to my room. After a couple of days to think about it, I thought I had developed a logical counterargument to get out of my punishment. Okay, I’m ready. I’ve assembled a reasonable stance, I’m going to present it, and I’ll get the keys for my Ninja back and be able to go to a party next weekend. Mom is always open to debate, as long as you have an actual point. So, here we go.

I walk into Mom’s office ready to present my case, if the glove doesn’t fit, you must acquit.I explain that my girlfriend and I were safe, she was consenting and enthusiastic. Mom had the talk with me some time ago, knowing that my last girlfriend and I were getting close and told me about condoms, safer sex, consent, attentiveness, all that. I put all her preparation into my argument, knowing I checked all the boxes for having sex with my girlfriend. It’s something people my age do, we are safe about it, it’s nothing to overreact about.

Once I finish Mom gives me the imperious glare that made experienced and hardened line cooks quiver in fright (and if you know anything about the industry, you know how hard it is to scare a hardened line cook). And says:

“You think I punished you for having sex with that girl? How incredibly dense. I punished you for lying to me about where you were. I understand teenagers have sex, I’m not stupid, but I will not brook being lied to. Don’t do it again. Two more weeks without your motorcycle, your car only for school, practice or karate, for the next month. Next time think about things and develop a better argument. Now go.”

And dismissed me with a flick.

I left. If I had been smoked a couple of days before I just got firebombed. Not only did I mistake what the punishment was for, but I also built an entire erroneous argument around that assumption. The entire thing was brutal, but Mom was definitely savage. It sucked then, but it definitely stuck with me. The entire thing is a funny story now, hence, this answer.

I immediately screamed, “Mom, they’re scammers, put down the phone immediately ”.

My mom shushed me and kept on talking with him. And as the guy on the phone said ‘For Security Purposes’, she recited her debit card number and expiry date and CVV to him. I was scared because my mother is very innocent and she doesn’t know about all these scams. And she was not listening to me either. My struggle with her kept going for a while and she continued listening to him. Then, She told that guy, “Son, OTP didn’t come. Try again”.

“Try again, Son” Please try once more, son. I don’t want my account to get closed. You are so helpful” I didn’t understand. That guy understood what was going on. So he insisted to disconnect the call ASAP. My mom said to him and I quote,

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